An official relationship costs too much for people. Some can’t even afford it.
It costs your time, efforts, loyalty, and mainly requires you to be “responsible“. People may feel they are in a jail where there are several rules forcefully implemented upon them.
The thought of being hitched with a man/woman forever can give nightmares.
Some can never accept the thought of being with the same person forever, whereas some are just not ready for the complexities of a relationship.
While for some, they just can’t don’t want to be answerable to someone.
If being in a loyal relationship is not an option and cheating is immorally wrong… then what will happen to the sexual desires and physical needs of a perfectly normal human being? After all, sex is a basic human need that can’t be ignored.
It is in these situations where being “friends with benefits” will come to your benefit.
The concept of friends with benefits is not totally new to you. You may have heard this word in a movie, or in some famous television series.
You know people who talk about how stress-free and fun it is to be involved in something like this!
But there is more to know about this term that you must know before you jump in to decide whether it is the right thing for you.
What exactly are friends with benefits?
Give it a thought – Being in just a physical relationship with someone for mutual satisfaction without the need to be emotionally present for them all the time and dealing with responsibilities that a relationship brings with it. Sounds awesome, right? This settlement is a friends with benefits arrangement.
The freedom to choose a life with no responsibility for being committed and simply enjoying private times together…
A relationship where there are no strings attached.
You can enter it with mutual discussion with a person whose needs resemble yours, who does not want anything serious and is ready to provide you for your sexual needs in order to satiate his own.
This person is your “Friend with benefits” or you can use the acronym and call him your FWD or sex-buddies.
Isn’t it just another new age thing?
Friends with benefits may seem a new age thing but it isn’t.
It was present in the old days and has just become more common in today’s time.
People are no longer ashamed to talk about it as they recognize the right of their choice.
A person can lead a fun adventurous life on his own terms. As long as he is not hurting anyone, why does the world need to interfere?
Is Friends with Benefits the right thing for you?
As fun as it sounds, being someone’s friends with benefits, can sometimes complicate things badly.
There is a chance of feeling more than just “sex-buddies” for your FWD companion. Physical satiation can give rise to feelings of love. You must be mature enough to handle such relations and situations. If you are not, do not play a game with your emotional capabilities.
If having sex is your main priority, then drop the idea of FWD and give one night stands a shot.
If you are looking for emotional support, true love, and a person you can proudly call your partner, then look for a committed loving relationship that can last and be yours forever.
But if you are not ready for commitment and long terms scare you, at the same time finding different ladies/men and approaching them for one-night stands is a bit too hard and you are not lucky in the game, friends with benefits can be your savior.
A friend whom you can trust and is looking for just some fun and nothing serious, can totally turn around the pale sheets of the bed and fill your sex life with adventure!
For some more details, let’s find out what friends with benefits do together!
What do friends with benefits do together?
1. They have awesome sex together – except the cuddling
The main reason two people got together in friends with benefits deal was to get laid. And what’s the use of it when they do not get some exciting adventurous sex!?
To know what friends with benefits do, here’s what they do – They fix up meetings not for dates, but for sex.
Action beneath the sheets is their favorite activities together. But they make sure to keep everything sensual, and not spiritual.
Cuddling with your FWD partner?
Sharing personal memories with him?
Opening deep planted secrets?
All these are completely a NO! NO!
They know if they will make these personal and the whole basis of an FWD arrangement will disappear. FWD is just about sex and fun times, and nothing else that circles around love.
It is very necessary for people to not put emotional energy when they are taking part in such an agreement.
Friends with benefits understand this.
They do expect their FWD to be emotionally available and take care of their needs. Wanting love and other things that involve emotional intimacy is not acceptable.
To work things out as they were originally planned, the thought of having their friend with benefits by their side when things go wrong or while going to see parents at hospital or marriage parties hand in hand is neither expected nor given.
Giving someone emotional support, taking care, gifting flowers or perfumes, holding their hand when things go wrong – all these trigger the budding feelings of love.
You expect these from your committed partner, who has felt much stronger than physical attraction. A lover is expected to do this. It is time to have a talk with your friend with benefits if he has started showing such concern.
And yes, friends with benefits do not go on a DATE!
3. They have a proper talk before going exclusive with anyone else.
Just because you are sleeping with someone, doesn’t mean you cannot look for your one true love.
Of course, you have no commitments for your FWD. You can do whatever you want. If you want to have someone you can call your own and spend a lifetime with, you have the permission to do that.
But there should not be any confusion left in your sex buddy’s mind. Make things clear. Do not end things abruptly. Sit with him and tell him that you have found the one and your loyalty doesn’t allow you to engage in such activities anymore. He should know that you enjoyed a good time with him and end things on a positive note.
There should not be any complications in his mind on why you left and ended things abruptly.
Of course, he must have been looking forward to spending some more good nights with you. When things end, he deserves a proper closure.
4. There is no place for jealousy.
People should pay special attention to avoiding unwanted feelings in such relationships. One of them is Jealousy.
Friends with benefits should have a clear understanding of the future of their relationship. If your buddy has found a special person with whom he wanna get committed, jealousy should not bother you as it was pre-eminent.
Results have shown that most of the people who are in such relationships do not confine their interests to just one person.
As there is no boundary of being loyal, getting involved with more than just one person is common. The other person should respect this decision and should not get jealous.
Dealing with jealousy is one of the things that force people to decline true love and getting involved in no strings attached relationships.
There is nothing more than sex that could be expected. No loyalty, no one-man or one-woman thing as this is different from other relationships.
Friends with benefits know that whatever they are engaging in is just for fun and they do not want to take anything else out of it. Especially if it is ‘children’ or ‘diseases’.
They know the importance of protection while they enjoy the most exciting adventure of the world confined in a room.
If you are thinking of exploring this too, it is advised to use proper condoms. If you are a woman, you will not like the fact that you became pregnant with a man who is not even interested in starting a life together.
If you are a man, becoming the father of an unwanted child while you were just having fun after a hard day at work can be life-changing – in a gruesome way, obviously.
It may sound awkward, but friends with benefits should know how many people his sex-partner is sleeping with.
It’s not about knowing details of their personal life, but to maintain sexual hygiene and health.
No one wants to see their name in the list of patients suffering from diseases spread from having sex. It is better to use protection and know the history of sex life of the person you are getting involved with and having regular checkups than letting things happen.
6. They explore sexting together.
Instead of sending messages with flowery language praising the beauty or redness of the cheeks of a beloved, friends with benefits do sexting together.
You send texts, but you get the pleasure of sex. 😉
Playful flirting, dedicating love songs, asking “How was the day?” or “What you ate for dinner?” are just a couple things and not appreciated. You are spared from the responsibility of making the other person special, remember?
Save the sweet texts and overflowing feelings of companionship and love for the person who will enter your life at a point who will make you do the things that you thought were never possible. (Like being loyal, committed and having the urge to spend a lifetime together) Your FWD partner does not want all that.
The only thing he/she wants is pleasure, without compliments on their beauty and kindness.
Yes, you can compliment on how good they are in bed, and how much you love their certain body parts.
Spending hours on executing pleasure out of text messages and innovative emoticons is a thing that you can enjoy if you are in such a relationship.
Sending nudes (if they are not getting viral) or naughty talks is what makes the chatbox of an FWD couple.
7. They can do everything together, but not fall in love!
You guys sleeping with each other? Check. ✔
You guys sexting each other? Check. ✔
You guys falling in love with each other? NO!! ❎
Thinking about him has started giving you goosebumps. You are listening to love songs and they are reminding you of the sex you had with him. The favorite part of a week is when you meet him for having sex.
If you are mistaking it for love, then wait!
This is not love, dear. This is just the attraction of the habit that you have cultivated around him. You love the SEX, not HIM.
If you still feel you are in love with the FWD partner, then you have committed a mistake. Friends with benefits can do everything together but not fall in love with each other. That will kill the vision with which they started.
Falling in love with such buddies can prove disastrous. They are not in love with you in the first place… if they were, they would have engaged in a serious relationship with you. One-sided love is not beautiful at all. It eats the life out of you.
If you start developing feelings for him, remind yourself why you decided not to date him and just have a physical thing in the beginning.
If he is the one who is interested, tell him your real intentions. Do not fake it just for the sake of good sex. You cannot play with someone else’s feelings for the pleasure of free sex.
Bonus: If you think your partner is behaving weird, give this a read before it’s too late: Signs your hookup partner has feelings for you
Friends with benefits is not for you if you are too emotional and link sex with love. But if you are not ready for a long-term thing and are capable enough to control your emotions in order to satisfy the needs of your body, think no more.
Just dive into the world of FWD! 😉