Love and crush are the two most common words in today’s gen. However, they are often used interchangeably.
It pains me to see how the youngsters claim to be in ‘I-can’t-live-without-him’ kind of love when they are really just crushing on his Tom Cruise looks.
So, I decided to write on it explaining both these emotions individually along with also depicting clear-cut differences between the two.
What is Crush?
Crush is a strong yet temporary feeling of attraction for a person. It is short-lived and is limited to the surface-level features.
The weak-in-the-knees kind of feeling when you see him in the blue shirt while he is sipping his black coffee is a crush.
What is Love?
Love can’t be defined. No words can ever put life into love. But here’s a sneak peek for you to reckon when the cupid hits you.
Love is a deep prolonged feeling of warmth and care for someone. It is unconditional, forgiving, understanding, and long-term.
Love does not depend on materialistic factors like beauty, fortitude, or property. It goes deep down to the soul that only wishes to spend more time with its object.
Irrespective of how perfect or faulty your object is, love only wants best for it.
Love VS Crush
As we have understood the meaning of both Love and Crush individually. It is time to spot out the differences now.
Here is your guide to find out whether you have found your true love or you are just crushing on him/her.
1. The punch in the beginning
Remember, when you see someone for the first time and it just gives you a kick in the pit of your heart. Your heart starts beating really really fast just at the thought of seeing that person and you just can’t hold yourself but steal glances in the midst. Everything goes on a fast-forward mode and in a matter of days you are all about him/her.
Trust me, it is not love. Even when your heart tells you a million times that it is. It is not. It is just a crush.
Love is slow and steady. It’s not about deep conversations and intense glances. For people who still believe Love at first sight is real – let me tell you one thing: IT’S NOT. It’s just infatuation. You can’t love a person with what he/she looks by the surface.
2. Temporary v/s Permanent
I am sure most of you have already guessed it!
Of course, crush is temporary and short-lived.
Just as fast as it hits, it vanishes equally fast. You don’t feel the void when it leaves. Moreover, in this fast-moving world when you meet so many new people every day. You will soon find a better face with charismatic features and in a matter of days, you will find a new crush!
But that doesn’t mean love is FOREVER.
We are discussing real life, not a fairytale.
It is certainly longer-lived than a crush but not lifelong. Love is very rhythmic and precise. Everything takes place like a hierarchy…one after the other.
3. What are the desires involved?
Love has a driving force of being together through thick and thin. You do not lose hope on tiny-little issues.
Even when you both fight like cats and dogs due to a misunderstanding. You still turn back, because love knows how to forget and forgive.
Love is not easy going. It is traditional and pure. Height, complexion, age, etc. are just mere numbers when you truly fall in love with someone.
Crush on the other hand is hollow. It is devoid of any kind of driving force. You continue liking someone for as long as your interest lies in them.
You do not even know where it all started from and where it stopped, all at once. You just moved on.
4. Here comes expectations
When you are in love, there is no scale to measure how much you received. You don’t expect him/her to love you back in equal measures.
Instead, your primary concern is to keep your loved one happy and you strive hard to do that. Obviously, you want to be pampered and taken care of by your partner but not at the cost of your partner’s wellbeing. Love is selfless.
After all, there’s a reason why it is regarded as the king of all emotions,
Whereas, crushes often do not last long if the other one seems disinterested. It is like a barter system of give-and-take. If you do not get what you want then that is it. Eventually, you start losing hope and the spark disappears.
5. Sacrifice or fight?
Like I said, Love is selfless.
It does not think of self-gain and can also resign with self-interest if it aids partner’s growth.
So, say suppose your partner has got a job abroad and you realize that it is going to be a kick start for his future. You will happily kiss him goodbye and wouldn’t mind meeting once in a year or even consider moving out yourself leaving all your dreams and family behind.
Your happiness lies in your partner’s happiness.
Crushes on the other hand are not so deeply invested in terms of emotions and intent. First of all, you might not know your crush so closely. There is also a high possibility that they may not open up to you about their concerns.
Don’t worry, this doesn’t make you a selfish monster, it’s just how crushes work.
6. Acceptance is different
The affection you have towards the person you love is truly remarkable. There are no limitations or ideals set in your mind that your partner must match.
It is okay if your food is half cooked one day or slightly overcooked the other day. It is also okay if you forget to buy her favourite ice cream and get home with some chocolates instead.
There is nothing called perfect in love.
Whereas, crushes are all about perfection. The way they look is how you expect them to look all-the-time. The way they dress up or sip a cup of coffee is your definition of being perfect.
Long story short –
Love is from the soul.
Crush is from the surface.
Still, there are so many of us who consider crush as love unless everything falls apart and so many others who believe crush can turn into love.
So, here’s the real picture of Can a crush turn into love?
Hey, cheer up!
You are right. Crush CAN turn into love.
Even though both of them have a list of distinct characteristics of their own, crush can still turn into love.
But, not vice-versa.
However, this transformation does not happen overnight. It needs time, effort, and good intent. You need to spend more time with each other, learn to trust one another, and let things move slowly.
If in the end, both of you experience joy while the other is smiling – that’s when you will know love is finally here!
But if you are still confused, here’s how you can know if she is the ONE for you.
It’s insane how both love and crush both tickles your gut, floods you with euphoria, and allows you to experience innate joy, yet differs in its very foundation.
Love is like a consuming flame that alters your thought process and you do things that you have never done before – all for your partner’s happiness.
However, crush is a spark within itself. It might be vibrant in the beginning but can soon diminish into thin air like it never existed.
But there’s no winner among the two because there’s no competition.
Love is Love. And crush is crush.
Both have their own set of adventures, lessons, and experiences.